When all seems uncertain...

The plan for this blogpost was to give you a normal-structured update about my life. About my pregnancy (4 months in already! 🙀🤰, my trip to Morocco, meeting my Moroccan family for the first time, about the shift into the autumn and about my upcoming Wild Wise Woman retreat that I am super excited about.

But instead, I am going to write a message from the heart, from what is present with me right now.

I am in bed and just had a good ol' cry about, well basically, life! In this particular case the uncertainty I am dealing with atm, a big feeling of not-knowing.

Not knowing where I will live this winter

Not knowing where I will give birth to our little earth angel

Not knowing who will be our birthkeepers during our planned homebirth

Not knowing if upcoming electricity prices will make us go bankrupt and end up on one of our parents couches (not that they would mind that time with their new grandchild)

Anyways, like after any cry, I am feeling a lot lighter.

And can remind myself that it's within these spaces of uncertainty and of not knowing the next steps.

That BIG shifts can happen

Albert Einstein said:

'There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.'

I can choose to belief that these challenges are presenting itself because life sucks. Because life is hard. Because I am not ready for motherhood. Because we were just never meant to realise our dreams and have to go with worst-case-scenario.

Or I can choose the belief that life is miraculous.

Either way, I will be proven right. Your reality will always reflect your beliefs: those who belief life is unmiraculous will find life to be unmiraculous and probably hard. Those who belief that life is miraculous will find miracles in everything (not so hard in my case with an ACTUAL human being growing inside my womb!).

I am choosing to see these uncertainties as a big invitation to lean into trust.

I see them as the universe testing me to see if I am ready for my deepest desires.

As opportunities for growth.

Besides, wouldn't life be friggin' boring if we always knew the next steps?

Not having it all figured out is part of the divinity of it all, part of the magic that makes the journey so exciting.

May this email be a reminder for you, who might be in a little rut or uncertainty, that things will fall into place.

Miracles will occur.

Your job is to let go.

Have a good cry/ scream/ bitching-to-a-person-who-probably-didn't-deserve-it (not guilty at all 👀)

Let it out.

And then choose again.

Choose to trust that within the chaos and within the unknowing is where life has a chance to fall into all the right places.

And this text may be your first sign that miracles are on the way...

Sending much love,

Zahra